


Letters to Evan Hansen

by kleinmeme



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson, Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson (Broadway Cast) Actor RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Angsy, Anxiety, Connor POV, Connor centric, Dreams, Fluff, Heavy Angst, High School, Letters, Love Letters, M/M, Pining, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicidal actions, Suicide Attempt, but evan is in love with zoe, connor got it BAD for evan, connor is gay, connor is going crazy too, connor just wants to cuddle, connor loves evan, evan is probably pan, im going crazy, maybe an au idk, maybe not an au, pinning, vivid dreams, you interpret this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:41:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22136461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kleinmeme/pseuds/kleinmeme
Summary: Why did Connor kill himself? Why was he so upset that day he ran into Evan? Did they secretly know each other that whole time?or, connor writes evan multiple handwritten notes and once - just once - evan replies.
Relationships: Evan Hansen/Connor Murphy
Comments: 4
Kudos: 31





	1. Chapter 1

Dear Evan Hansen,

hi. we haven’t talked in a long time lol. yeah uh. ~~hey dude, still like trees?~~ ~~hey dude, i think you left this leaf at my house~~ evan i have no idea what to even say to you. we haven’t spoke since i threw that hammer at you and i know i shouldn’t have. fuck, i’m bad at saying sorry. ~~i’m sorry dude~~ i really am sorry. i know i could have hurt you really bad, i’m sorry. ~~i want you back dude~~ i wanna talk to you again. you were my only friend. 

Connor Murphy.


	2. Chapter 2

Dear Evan Hansen,

~~hey i miss you so much like GOD please why cant you forgive me? i miss your dumb face and your dumb trees and GOD you’re so passionate about trees and i love that about you~~ ~~please just~~

i hope i scribbled that out enough. i would get a different piece of paper but i dont have anymore and i’m NOT about to ask jared for some. dude pls reply to me i wanna talk about anything **EXPECT TREES.** (underlined three times with 16 asterisks surrounding it)

Connor Murphy


	3. Chapter 3

Dear Evan Hansen,

~~today is your birthday.~~ happy birthday ev. i know you’re probably not reading these and ur just throwing them away so i’m wasting my time writing these. miss you dude. 

if you would reply we could go to the orchard? you could look at trees while i pretend to listen ~~(i would listen to anything you had to say and i love when you talk about trees)~~ maybe we could just at least smile at each other in the hall? dude i dont want to lose a friend pls. sorry i threw a hammer. 

Connor Murphy


	4. Chapter 4

Dear Evan Hansen,

you think this is fucking funny? fucking answer me. i bet you think i’m creepy leaving all these notes on your desk. you’re the sick one WHY CANT YOU JUST FUCKING ANSWER ME???

connor. 


	5. Chapter 5

Dear Evan Hansen,

i’m m sorry for getting angry. ~~i just wanted to talk to you. i miss you. i wanna talk. do you miss me? i miss you. please talk to me. i want to talk. do you think we can be friends again? if i stop getting angry will you consider befriending me again? why cant you take my hand?~~

yeah pls reply??? i wanna apologize in person but i wanna know if thats okay first

Connor Murphy.


	6. Chapter 6

Dear Evan Hansen,

hey will you tell jared to leave me alone

connor murphy. 


	7. Chapter 7

Dear Evan Hansen,

i bought you a leaf from this like 500 year old tree, i spent my entire paycheck on it so pls meet me somewhere so i can give it to you

i’d like to see you so we can make up and i can give you the leaf

Connor Murphy


	8. Chapter 8

Dear Evan Hansen,

i’m not a school shooter. im not a bad person, evan. i’m never gonna hurt you again, please write me a note back. 

at least write a note back if you ~~still care about me~~ forgive me. 

Connor Murphy. 


	9. Chapter 9

Dear Evan Hansen,

~~fuck you. im gonna tear up your leaf~~

please write back. i just wanna know you’re okay. 

Connor Murphy. 


	10. Chapter 10

Dear Evan Hansen,

~~can we start over?~~ i’m trying to get better so we can be friends again. lets just start over. im not as angry anymore, please reply to me. i want to be friends. 

Connor Murphy


End file.
